Thursday, October 16, 2008

I WAS SO ANGRY.....

I have always thought of all people, I would be one level headed woman when it came to issues with my children. I really did.

Not so, number one.......I nearly lost my mind yesterday. On Wednesday afternoon, my middle son (MS) came home from school and asked to speak to me privately. Uh oh, is what I first thought. What has he done now. (He tends to run his mouth alot and trouble seems to find him). I am not blind to my child's faults.

Apparently, another boy had punched him in the mouth on the bus on the way home from school and called him some rather unflattering names. The first question I asked was what did you say that made him hit you? Okay, that was so wrong. I backed up and said, it doesn't matter, nothing gives him the right to hit you.

So I went to the school, the principal wasn't there and the snotty woman at the front desk informed me that there was no one there that could speak in her absence. WTF??? Is this a public school or what? She didn't even ask me what I needed to speak with her about. And finally, when I said, you mean to tell me that someone can assault my child and you can't help me? Then she was like, Oh where did it happen. When she found out it was on the bus, she said we can't help you, you'll have to go so and so. I was livid.
So I went to so and so and they pulled the video of the bus ride home. Guess what, you can clearly see my son trying to ignore this person. This other person got up from a seat behind where my son was sitting and began punching his arm. (My son will not fight because we have told him it is not the way to handle things). So on the video you can see this other person get up while the bus is moving and change seats to deliberately antagonize my son. And on the video you can clearly see my son trying his best to keep his back turned to the other person. The other person hit him about three times on his arm and then my son turned around and put his hands up around his face. The other person stood up and punched him right in the face. I didn't know they had videos on the bus. Well, needless to say, I called the principal later in the day to find out what had been done about this other person. She tells me, get this, they cannot tell me anything about the discipline of the other child because it would violate HIS rights. Are you kidding me? What about my child's rights to an education without living in fear of some bully?
We try very hard to do what's right, but I'm freaking out over all this stuff.
Anyone with similar experiences have any advice for me. I'd love to hear it.

11 comments:

jill jill bo bill said...

I am so sorry! yes, my daughter Claire had that. She was bullied verbally and physically for 3 years by this snot. No one took care of because her grandmother was a teacher there and she NEVER got in trouble. So I did the same thing, don't retaliate, ignore, blah blah blah. Finally after the little B cut a chunk out of my daughter's hair, I told her to let her have it. About a week later, Claire came home and said she was kicked off the bus because she punched this girl. Out cold. So I gladly drove my daughter to school for a month with a smile on her face. That brat never talked to my daughter again.

Kori said...

Sorry after an incident with my oldest getting stabbed in the head with a pencil and having to go to the ER (of course) And the other child only getting suspended off the bus for two weeks. Yeah I'm no help that's a pretty sore subject.

Kate said...

Wow, what a crazy thing to happen. I'd be punching someone in the face myself (I do try to restrain myself though!).

Oh, and I stopped by to tell you.... you won the LTDchix giveaway on my site! Great, huh!!
Here's my email, shoot me an email and I'll give you the details on how to redeem your wonderful t-shirt. It's fromadesperatehousewife@gmail.com. Talk to ya later!

John Deere Mom said...

That sucks! I would be angry too...hopefully this piece of work won't bother you son again and if he does? Make some demands and call the superintendent...that might get you somewhere.

Southern Rose said...

I wish I was there to give you a big hug and let you cry on my shoulder.

My family is my life - just like you - and no one messes with my kids on my watch. But you can't be there for every trial. As much as I have wanted to protect my kids from violence and keep them naïve, I have learned I can't shield it all and they have to deal with the world eventually, nasty as it is at times. There is no excuse though. I hope that the other child was punished sufficiently. I agree and think that everyone should be told his punishment. When people break the rules, they should be made examples of and then the other kids will learn a lesson as well. What rights does he have in regard to his punishment being let known? That doesn't make sense.

If you can believe it, when our TJIII was in the 6th grade, he was "bullied" by another 6th grader - who was almost half his size! TJ wanted to punch his lights out on a daily basis for the first 3 months of school. I have also taught the kids that fighting is no answer. I've taught them to just walk away - don't even acknowledge the other person. Find a teacher or an adult if it escalates. Even if the adult doesn't take them seriously, at least they get them involved and the child will not be able to do anything. Eventually this kid must have stopped because TJ said nothing more after a few months.

Karin @ 6ByHisDesign said...

um, hello. Angry isn't strong enough word.

Good luck with this one. I cannot imagine...

Melissa said...

I'm glad you got the video to prove MS's innocence in this incident.

I got your lovely pedicure gift in the mail yesterday. Thank you again. I'm so excited.

Love you....Give Chris an encouraging word from the Botleys. We are proud of him for handling the situation in a Christ like manner.

Midwest Mommy said...

Oh my gosh! I am not looking forward to things like this. This is when my heart hurts thinking about my child in this situation.

Dena said...

Violate his rights huh...well maybe since your son was assaulted then the police/DA's office should press charges after you report it to them and they see the tape. We have cases here that the school handles, but usually violent kids here are removed from school at the very least temporarily with assessments from school psych./social workers. Maybe you just need to push the issue a little more outside the school.

LuckyMe said...

Take it to the police. Give the kid a good scare. Then out of the kindness of your heart, let it go.

Dena said...

Hey Shelly. Thanks for the comment on the bows. No no store on etsy yet but working on it. Tough working full time and two babies to find the time to keep up, but I really want to. It is the goal over the next year.